Once again our Medical Correspondent is warning of a new scourge sweeping our community. “Simianus Bullshitticus”, more commonly called “Baboon Fever”, is appears to be an evolution of the dreaded one-day flu.
Dr. M. of Flemington, a specialist in Simianus Bullshitticus, said “This comes on after you get the one-day flu and it just makes everything worse! You are huddled up in bed trying to sleep off the one-day flu and over comes some baboon who goes on and on about drinking too much alcohol, the benefits of yoga & banana yoghurt and then gives you a hug and BAM! Baboon fever!!! Not only do you have a headache and need to sleep, but now you smell of baboon poo too”.
Fortunately, like the one-day flu, Baboon Fever is short lived and most monkeys seem to recover within a day or so. Our Medical Correspondent recommends a premium hydration experience and a day or two of not drinking alcohol to excess.